Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Went in the ditch - but now I am traveling on the road again.

Boy - this weekend I went in the ditch big time.  Things had been going along pretty smoothly and then bam - just hit the darkness hard.  Going to our son's for Easter helped - hard to stay in the ditch with loving family and those two young men who are grandsons.

Yesterday and today I have been focusing on each hour - make sure each hour is positive.  I am doing something each hour that makes me feel good about work to be done and fun to be enjoyed.  I have had more time in my studio which is always a help.  

Is it the "grieving process"?  I suspect it is a part of it that I had not expected.  It kind of feels like Mom has died and now it is my turn to get ready to pass.  Really a strange feeling but once I put it into words, it is easier to deal with.  Who knows how many years they have left to love and enjoy but those left for me will be good even if difficult things happen.  It is a hard feeling to put into words and may well be a normal part of grieving at my age when a parent passes.  

We are going to get away for a couple days later in the week and I know that will also help.  It will get better.

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