It continues to amaze me . . .

As you can probably guess - I haven't quilted a quilt for a while. I have been playing off and one with the IQ - trying some of the new features, but mostly I have been being the "granny nanny" and the "elder parent health care advocate".

And it is a good thing that I do my best work under pressure. Now, I am under the gun to get something nice done on this quilt for my SIL in the next few days. So, this morning I came up to my studio and loaded it and got started with some SID. It never ceases to amaze me how dependable my "Miss Daisy" is whenever I call her into service. Miss Daisy is my A1 quilting machine.

I love, love, love her. There is never an issue. She starts, takes to any thread, makes beautiful stitches, is smooth as silk, very quiet, easy to maintain, has wonderful movable handlebars, a great cruise sewing mode and asks nothing of me except I am sure she would like to be driven a bit more often. I promise I will do that. I could just give her a great big hug!

I am blessed - life doesn't get any better than this.

And a baby is born . . .

There is nothing like the joy of a brand new baby - a reassurance that all is good in the world.

Walker Redding Wagner arrived late last night, May 22. Here are a couple pics. One of that precious face and one of him being held by his big brother, Westin.

Mom, Dad and all the grandparents are doing fine. He is a very quiet little guy, very peaceful.

We are blessed!!!!

What we do to our elderly . . .

I will try to remember this quote as I write:

"So the writer who breeds more words than he needs, is making a chore for the reader who reads." Dr. Suess

Yesterday I went to Missoula for a "team" meeting with the caregivers and family for Dad who is in a nursing home there - 200 miles west of here. He has become extremely agitated over the past few months and is now becoming mean and violent with caregivers. I have been there 5 times in the past 6 weeks. They have given him numerous drugs, upped the doses, and recently involved a psychologist who is advocating another antipsychotic drug. No one wants to tell you what the drugs are and I had to be very direct and diligent to get the list. I do have POA medical. I then come home and read for hours on what the drugs are, what each is supposed to do and what the possible side effects can be. He has all of the possible side effects compounded. My brother wants him put in a room in lockdown and just walk away as he cannot stand to "see him like this". My sister wants nothing to do with any of it and she lives right there in the same town. Although she is now off doing "dinner theatre" in Arizona. Mom just thinks he is mean and should be able to control himself. He is 90. This family is "dinner theatre".

We are going to try some things before any more drugs. We will get him off the narcotic pain pill as he has similar trouble with morphine - which they know. His pain is from age related arthritis. None of the other 5 different drugs he is taking are for anything except to manage his behavior.

We moved them here 3 years ago after a bad fall Dad had taken that caused some pretty serious brain bleeding. Neither of them were happy here in a senior living facility. They wanted to go home to Missoula so we did that when they were able after 6 months. Mom "managed" Dad's needs through overmedication, the wrong meds, and insisted on cancer treatment for prostate cancer that was totally incapsulated (he was 89). That is another whole story, but that was the start of this journey to the nursing home rather than being able to be at home with inhome care.

So that is my gripe for the day. I am trying to be an adult today. It is hard. I really want to be a child on the farm and run free in the fields. I will keep trying to be an adult, but a long, hard walk will have to suffice.

Long, good day . . .

A great Friday. I started out with a good walk in our mall and then a quick run through Joann's and even found a jacket pattern I have been looking for and it was only 1.99 - McCall's - on sale.

Then I got home and a good friend called me and we met for lunch so it was back into town again. We lingered over some great lunch - I had my favorite - crabcakes which is an appetizer with a bit of a spicy slaw. I love it as a lunch. They are the best crabcakes - all crab.

I even got in some sewing this afternoon - not quilting, but regular sewing.

Bob and I then picked up Weston about 4 and we played for the rest of the day before we took him home about 8. He is having a funny time now as we all wait for the baby brother to be born. He wants us all together all of the time. He is great fun - and quite a challenge. I always remember a saying from an older family friend about grandkids - "God knows what he is doing when he gives them to the young".

Tomorrow we are off to Missoula for a quick visit and then we won't be leaving town again until that baby arrives.

Got back from HMQS

I got back late last night from Salt Lake City where we spent a couple days at HMQS. The "we" part refers to two long-time friends from college and we met up there. I thought it was a good show with lots of vendors and gorgeous quilts. My favorite part was visiting informally with David Taylor as he quilted one of his pieces and talked with casual small groups who watched him work and asked lots of questions.

We all agreed that when we do it again, we need another day. It was a fun trip!

Happy Mother's Day!

A mother holds her children's hands for a while...their hearts forever.
-- Author Unknown

A mother understands what a child does not say.
-- Jewish proverb

It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.
-- Erma Bombeck

I never knew how much love my heart could hold until someone called me "mommy."
-- Author Unknown

I'd rather be a mother than anyone on earth
Bringing up a child or two of unpretentious birth...
I'd rather tuck a little child all safe and sound in bed
than twine a chain of diamonds about my [carefree] head.
I'd rather wash a smudgy face with round, bright, baby eyes
Than paint the pageantry of fame or walk among the wise.
-- Meredith Gray

I wonder about things . . .

"So the writer who breeds more words than he needs, is making a chore for the reader who reads." Dr. Suess

As I get older there are tons of things that I "just plain wonder
about". And many of those things seem to be connected to technology communication . I have used various technologies for communication for over 25 years. I started out using email for business only - and only for information that was not emotional. Sometimes it seems to me that as we have included more communication uses, we have not done the best job of figuring out how to best communicate without hurling attack words or judgemental phrases.

Sometimes I read something on a blog or one of the discussion boards and I think - hmmm - I need to write and straighten out that person's thinking. I bet they just don't realize how judgemental and rude they are sounding. I get in my "I know better than they do" mode and plan to help them - and what a help that would be, huh? I wonder why I do that?

In the past I may have even written a response, left a comment, or on occasion I have written a personal email and once I even made a pretty stupid phone call thinking I was helping. As Dr. Phil would say, "And how is that working for you?" Not very well at all! On each occasion, I have been embarrassed and soon wished I wouldn't have done that. Now I don't respond. The little voice in my head says, "No" and I listen. So, I guess you could say that I have learned - finally!

It has taken me some time to come to realize that we all have opinions based on our experiences, intellectual capacity and maybe even our emotional world at the time. We use tools available through the technology to voice those opinions - to all or to a small focused group. We can read or not what others say or write. We can like them or not. Sometimes I almost enjoy the rants of some online and I would not enjoy it at all if I were in the same room - I would leave. I would be embarrassed for them in person. We have become so disconnected with the person, so impersonal.

Lots of things to wonder about. . . and this post probably fits the quote. . .
"So the writer who breeds more words than he needs, is making a chore for the reader who reads." Dr. Suess

Letting go . . .

We went to Missoula yesterday to visit the parents. They are doing as ok as they can considering. I had lots of time to think and visit with Bob as we drove. It was Bob's first day of "retirement" as we have sold the business officially now to our son Stan. It will be good.

One of the things that kept coming into my mind was about "letting go". I am ready to start the next part of my journey. I have tried some different things with my quilting art world in the past few months and I am much more clear on that journey. I have had many changes in my personal and family life in the past few months and more to come. Here are some quotes I found that will help for guidance along this part of the trail. . .

"Letting go doesn’t mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be."
-- Anon

"Think about any attachments that are depleting your emotional reserves. Consider letting them go.'
-- Oprah Winfrey

"We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us."
-- Joseph Campbell

"When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be."
-- Lao Tzu

Today, I start to practice "letting go".