Feeling all messed up inside . . .

It feels I have been strong for so long now and today I just don't want to be strong any longer.  I want Walker to be ok.  I hate it when a little guy has to go through this posterior fossa syndrome stuff and we don't even know yet the type of tumor so the bad stuff could be yet to come.  I want to scream and scream but I know that won't do any good.  And I hate being here while he is down there.  I feel like I am totally out of the loop and it is even worse today.  I know I need to get through this since this is not about me.  But, damn it, I hate this.  I need to figure out something.

So today the delivery men from Lowes called to tell us they were delivering the new refrigerator we purchased there two weeks ago.  What?  I had forgotton all about it.  It was 7:30 when the call came and they said they would be there in 20 minutes.   I hadn't forgotten I had purchased it as our old one was kind of limping along.  But I had forgotten this was the day for the delivery.  

I was in bed so I jumped up and started emptying out the old refrigerator and got it done.  The guys came, took out the old one, brought in the new one, shoved it in the hole and informed us the cupboards were not right so it would set even.  They then left and said to just wait a while and it might settle in better.

What?  When they left we looked and they had not even brought down the front legs - and they had it sitting crooked.  On one corner nothing was touching the floor.  I am not sure how they managed that but it was certainly what was making it crooked.   So I had to call and get them to return.  First I was informed they would try to get back out at the end of their day if there was time.  No that was not going to work for me.  They needed to do their job correctly the first time as I needed to reload the food.  Finally after a couple more calls up the Lowes food chain, I got them to return about an hour and a half later and they were not happy.  Needless to say, neither was I.

They came in the kitchen and mouthy about what needed to be done.  First they said the cupboards were not correct - wrong!  They were installed by one of the best companies here in Bozeman 3 years ago and the previous fridge was the same size and it fit - snuggly - but it fit.  They finally pulled it out again and did do it right after some very stern words from me.  I had to tell one of them who was really mouthy and rude that he needed to stop or else I would ask him to leave my home.  Not a good experience at all.  Once it was done correctly, the refrigerator is nice and I know we will enjoy it.  It fits the space, is level, and looks good.